My Blog

REM sleep? I was in REM sleep when I was punching, kicking, screaming and talking. Yes I asked google mini. REM sleep scares the shit out of me! Well Jason told me that I screamed Sophie don't get that box. Because I recognized the box that was flying around.   I guess I was in deep sleep and in REM sleep.  Man, that scared the shit out of me!  Yes I realized that that mentioned that it scares the shit out of me. I meant to.  I had set up my Google nest hub to track my sleep. It can track.  REM sleep, Deep sleep, and of course sounds like coughing and snoring. UGH!  Yeah, Google told me I coughed twice during my sleep.  How does Google nest hub know this?  I really don't know.  So far I had maybe a week of restless nights. One time Google told me I was in a deep sleep for 3 minutes. 3 minutes. LOL

Someone is really being hard-headed and not in their right frame of mind. I just told him I have auditory processing difficulties and selective mutism the two official diagnosis. Selective mutism diagnosis since I was 5 and I think the auditory processing difficulities diagnosis since I believen when I was 15 because I was in high school I think. Then I told him that I have undiagnosed autism and ADHD. Which I believe that there maybe some truth to that. It is just hard to see it in a selective mutism individual. I really believe that. I also told him that I am very high maintenance. UGH! Oh my God! Of course I love a man in a uniform. Examples would be a policeman, fireman and guys in the army but that is besides the point. hehe LOL! This is kind of fun but kinda freaky. In other words, I am messing with his mind. I don't mean any harm. I would not hurt a fly, well a fly maybe.  I would not hurt a butterfly, or dragonfly or any animal.  I know this looks bad---but I j...

I don't know what to think because people have always done my thinking for me a lot of the times in the past and now it's hard for me to talk now.  I listen to other people and then listen to Devon.  Let's see what was the question I asked myself.   Oh!  

A guy from the army texted me on Whatsapp and he started telling me all about himself.  Sure I like the attention but maybe it's time that I learn the difference in scammers and not scammers.  Maybe I need to buy a book to be able to learn the difference.   I hate that people have to lie and say that they are in the army just to get a romance going.  I want to look for the good in people but how can I when there are so many scammers out there that say the same thing over, and over and over and over and over again!  If one more pops up like that I will not believe a damn word he says to me!!! 

There is a Chihuahua puppy that I want.  She has all her shots and is a registered puppy. (i don't know what registered means) She is trained and potty trained.  Problem is my mom says there is too many dogs already. By the time this puppy is an adult dog, when I do get to move it probably could be in an apartment along with Nicki Rose.   There is already two cats--Lucky-Love and Happy (babygirl).  Lucky-Love has just a little big of anxiety and well Happy doesn't like to be picked up. Sometimes Happy(babygirl) will allow me to pick her up.  I grab her and say "gotcha!"  OMG!  Happy (babygirl) is so cute!  Yeah, Happy is the cat that I attracted through the law of attraction.   I will attract a cute little full-bred Chihuahua through the law of attraction.  Well it may not be before my 50th birthday but I will attract a full-bred Chihuahua after my 50th birthday!  

  Mental Trash When did the voice inside your head start talking? When I first noticed my 'thought-chatter', I was about 11 years old and just going into the 6th grade at Vincent Middle School.  From 3 to up until 10, my 'thought-chatter' was just straight silent.  My 'thought-chatter' didn't want to be silent anymore.  I wanted to talk and speak my thoughts.   "She will never get what she wants if she doesn't talk". by my dad in the kitchen on 468 Royal Oaks Drive in Vacville Calif.  I was 17 years old when he said that. I was sitting in the living room because I was told to.  So I could think about what I had done--and why it was wrong.  Oh that was so wrong.  I think---well I did crank call the school in 1991, and they thought that I wouldn't speak to anyone. Well they were wrong! I only speak in certain situations and to certain people.   My mom and My granmaw were talking in front of me and saying that my mom was going to ...

I did have an anxiety attack on Wednesday, July 5 and about 20 minutes after we hung up on Zoom, I recognized it as an anxiety attack because I had shaky hands.  That is when I figured I would lay back under my weighted blanket for about 20 minutes.  I ended up falling asleep until 3:30 pm.  I have a saggy mattress so I haven't been sleeping well at all.  Well, I just around to flipping the mattress over and sleeping on the more firmer side and omg! I slept well!!!  I thought the other side was going to be like a piece of plywood but no it was soft but more firm than the other side--the pillowtop side.  The flipping over the mattress is just to by some time until 2025 when I get a new mattress or an entirely new bed.  Why?  I hate that footboard on it now because it is a pain in the butt to make up.  Well not really but I did hit my hip on that footboard and it hurt like a mthr f--r!    I have a question.  Would a saggy mattres...