My Blog

Saturday July 4, 2016 | Is there someone in your life you didn't instantly warm to, who you've since become closer to? Why do you think this is? Yes! I spent years studying the faces of my relatives, trying to figure out where, or even from whom, I inherited my selective mutism. This is not something to take lightly. I believe selective mutism is a serious condition that demands attention. I probably grew up much like my sister Karin, taught in the same way she was, but I learned differently. My brain was wired differently. I was born to stand out—I was meant to stand out! Saturday July 4, 2026 | If you had the power, what law would you introduce in your home state or country? I wish there were a law that stopped anyone from taking advantage of people with disabilities, unless there was genuine mutual trust. It’s just an idea, though—I’m not planning to act on it. My body says no, and honestly, who would even give me a ride? When I was younger, I never spoke to anyone, but now ...

Do stress hormones-- cortisol and adrenolen raise blood sugar and blood pressure? Does perimenopause and menopause have symptoms with a thin layer of muscle pain from head to toe? Is muscle tension common in perimenopause? Is increased heart rate common in perimenopause? Is heart palpitations common in perimenopause?

I get angry when people raise their voice at me.  This increases a freeze response and causes me to shut down speech.  Now, how can I use it in a positive way?  I think most of my anger came from not being able to speak and not being properly treated for selective mutism.  I was going to have a speech class or speech thing before hurricane harvey hit back in 2017.  They just didn't want me to or I just looked so anxious in the face that they changed their minds about the speech class.  It was way out there in ten buck two also known as "the worst part of town" and the Lamar university area.  No, the worst part of town is Southpark in Beaumont Texas.  Another area is not a good part of town is Magnolia Avenue in Beaumont Texas.  

My thoughts are I have learned that if I show anxiety, I get negative attention.  If I hide it, I am safe.   I don't want to mask anymore.  So something taught me to hide anxiety.  

I’m great at exercising, meditating, rocking Nicki Rose, and caring for animals by ensuring they have food, water, and a warm place to sleep. I’m also skilled at making jewelry and journaling, though not so much about my feelings. My emotions tend to be all over the place, but I’d like to take on the challenge of journaling them sometime in the near future.

When you care about everything else but your house, that is I think is anxiety.  That is when you wish that your house would go up in smoke without the people and animals in it of course.  This is why I am waiting to buy a bed or new mattress.  It is a lot easier to just send the new bed over to the new house or apartment rather than just moving everything to the new place.  When I turn 55, I want to move with or without them and I want that adjustable bed frame with a new mattress.