My Blog

Yes, I have been attacked by an animal.  It was my sister's best friend's dog--but it was still an animal.  I believe that I was 5 years old, and around the same time I got my tonsils taken out.  And furthermore, there was something wrong with my nose and the doctor put a bandage on my nose.  I remember there was a bandage on my nose at 5 years old.  I am wondering if the dog bite would trigger selective mutism in me?   

I remember a time when my grandma and I were on our way to pick up my sister and aunt from school. I ran out of the house to her car, shouting, “I’ll drive, Granmaw!” She’s told me that story countless times. I wish I knew what happened to me when I developed selective mutism. I think I was speaking a little when I was 2 or 3 years old.   In June 1992, I was in a car accident. All I saw coming toward my dad’s van was a big yellow Penske moving truck. I tumbled inside the van and ended up the most injured, with a ruptured spleen. I still have nightmares about it to this day. I haven’t woken up screaming in a while, but I will tell you when it happens again. Could my waking up screaming be from that accident?  Could it be trauma related, or anxiety related or is it normal?

I once dreamed of becoming an actress, but I lacked both the resources and the accessibility to pursue it. Initially, I hoped acting might help me navigate my selective mutism, but I was constantly discouraged by others who insisted that verbal communication was a non-negotiable requirement for the craft. After hearing that so many times, I eventually gave up. It is difficult not to feel like some people simply aren't meant to pursue their ambitions.

The best part of being single is not having to share anything unless we actually feel like it.

I’m not going to spend it. I’ll just put it in the bank and save it until the next payday. Why? I’m not sure. I don’t have any money left, so why not just spend it and blow it all? 

  Let's start when I was about 2 years old.  Did I speak?  Did I speak to family members or cousins?  I remember my mom telling me that I spoke to my uncle at two years old.  I said, "are you comfortable?"  I did speak in a 2 year old voice.  As most two years olds tend to be I didn't think that I pronounced words right.  Okay, If I was diagnosed with selective mutism when I was 5 and then my great grandmother passed away. Everyone called her little mama except me.  I called her big mama. It made her mad though.  Think about it how adults look to 2, 3, or even a 4 year old little person I once was.  You can understand how a little person would call someone big.  I did not mean that she was fat I guess that was how she took it.  OKay. I was 5 and I was diagnosed with selective mutism, my sister's best friend's dog bit me and I think my great grandmother passed away.  It was probably the dog bite and the passing of my g...