Saturday September 21, 2024 11:07pm | what am I thinking?

Today on the way to my sister's house, I was making myself crazy thinking about my life that when mom and dad um... Are not here anymore. I became in a depressed state but tried to hide it outside of me.  It is really hard for me to explain why I look like that.  But as we were leaving, I saw my dad walking from the back of the car when Rebecca was putting his walker in the trunk of the car. My dad was walking and was almost in tears.  

Earlier today on September 21, I was in meditation and I had a panic attack and almost cried. Instead, I went back to listen to the guided meditation and followed her voice. I was fine after that.  When I got out of meditation, I couldn't stop moving my feet and my legs until I got up from my chair. So I figured I was just sitting there for 20 minutes or so and I ignored it. 

Sunday September 22,2024 7:31AM |  I am just afraid that my SM would kick in and I would go into a terrible depression. I would have to get a service dog.  🐕‍🦺🐕