Sunday April 26, 2020

Does anyone else ever think about hurting themselves or other people?  I try not to but the thoughts still keep coming.  I try to think something else but those thoughts come back after about a couple of days.  What is it called?

What was I thinking when I was in that apartment over there at Seville Apartments?  When I moved over there I was going to take care of my grandmother but when she moved into the nursing home, I became so isolated and withdrawn. I did not want to leave my apartment to go for a walk.  I would dread going down to the laundry room to do my laundry.  I became sad.  I wanted to move but I did not want to move back home to mom and dad's house.  I wanted to be friends with one lady who is an African American but was afraid.  She even asked me to ask her if she wanted to walk with me somewhere the next time I walked to the store or Walmart.  I wanted to but was very afraid to.  :'( 

Then on December 20, 2012 I guess I had a panic attack and I guess it was about my Grandmother.  I cried, and cried.  And I am crying as I type this too.

I wrote this blog... um... about three weeks before my granmaw passed away. 
https://unpretty125.blogspot.com/2012/12/memories-at-age-of-three.html