Saturday July 8, 2023 | MENTAL TRASH

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 Mental Trash


When did the voice inside your head start talking? When I first noticed my 'thought-chatter', I was about 11 years old and just going into the 6th grade at Vincent Middle School.  From 3 to up until 10, my 'thought-chatter' was just straight silent.  My 'thought-chatter' didn't want to be silent anymore.  I wanted to talk and speak my thoughts.  

"She will never get what she wants if she doesn't talk". by my dad in the kitchen on 468 Royal Oaks Drive in Vacville Calif.  I was 17 years old when he said that. I was sitting in the living room because I was told to.  So I could think about what I had done--and why it was wrong.  Oh that was so wrong.  I think---well I did crank call the school in 1991, and they thought that I wouldn't speak to anyone. Well they were wrong! I only speak in certain situations and to certain people.  


My mom and My granmaw were talking in front of me and saying that my mom was going to kill Jason for giving me that camera for my birthday and Granmaw said that if you keep flirting with them and they start flirting with you and then what will you do--- come running down here to Granmaw's apartment.  Firstly, I was not flirting and I did not want them flirting either.  Besides that I have a boyfriend.  Well I have had two boyfriends.  I had one boyfriend since May 1997 and the other since February 2011.  That was AJ.  I really loved AJ.  I know that we were just playing.  lol!  I watched AJ go through 2 girlfriends--when will it be my turn?  But he told me he has cancer.  But was that a lie? AJ, I am the most honest person you will ever meet.  AJ told me once that he would sure that I was taken care or was that a lie too, AJ? 


Well here is part 2 of my mental trash can.










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