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I am so tired of my family and friends assuming everything.  If I'm not on google, I am on YouTube watching podcasts. But they also say that I watch other people who have other disorders and copying off of them!  Why would I copy there disorder?  Why would I do that?  When I have selective mutism to face. Humm?  Self-harmed today because he said that I was assuming that Well I keep getting the impression that they are assuming that I don't know anything about selective mutism and I should ask a doctor because doctors tell the truth.  Doctors do not know shit about selective mutism!   The only one who doesn't assume anything about me is AJ. Why?  I just need to forget about him and move on.  I can't ask anyone anything.  I am limited to what I can do and what I can ask.  

Well I done had two panic attacks today.  One because of the crouded place and two when I was coming out of the place that when my niece grad from, I almost fell off a step. No not really.  But I did grab for that railing to hold onto it. Yes, I did do that 4, 6, 7 meditation if that is what that is. I do know how to calm that panic/anxiety attack down.   Later today, we all went out to eat after Rebecca's graduation.  When it was time to pay, Gerard said that he would pay.  Right before my mom said "thank you very much"  I said thank you in my head. My mom said what I wanted to say-but the words just won't come out.  There is something that you need to know about selective mutism no one else knows.  It just feels like to me that there is a rock stuck in my throat.  I say things in my head and when someone else says something, it's like there is a rock stuck in my throat.   That was um... very weird.  Mom said what I wante...

1. I don't think that I have an important relationship.  Define important relationship?   2. Well I can start by being more positive and understanding.  3. How do I get this conversation started? 

  @beginnerdancetutorials What better way to celebrate FriYAY than with some dancing to NKOTB?! 🤩🩷🧡 @New Kids on the Block dc: Kevin Maher and Sunny Walters #nkotb #newkidsontheblock #dance ♬ original sound - Beginner Dance Tutorials @beginnerdancetutorials Learn NKOTB’s latest music video choreography with this step-by-step dance tutorial 🩷🧡 Head to the “Kids” playlist on my profile to learn PART 2! 🎶 “Kids” by @New Kids on the Block dc: Kevin Maher and Sunny Walters 💃🏻 See the dance here ➡️ @Beginner Dance Tutorials #newkidsontheblock #nkotb #dancetutorial ♬ original sound - Beginner Dance Tutorials

Baylor college of medicine in Houston says I have Tourette like symptoms. I kind of agree.  I do practice mindfulness but it's extremely hard.  Tourette like symptoms is what they described as Tourettism?  

I was looking on Pinterest and the first part of this poem was on there.  So I got into Paint Shop Pro and added another part to the poem to it and here is what I got.  I come up the darnedest things!  LOL!  

I was diagnosed with selective mutism at age 5. I don't think there was any violence when my parents got divorced. I mean I don't think that there was any violence. There was arguing back and fourth between the two but that is about it. It's sounds so obvious that my parents would get a divorce when I was 4 and then I developed selective mutism. This may be how or even why I developed selective mutism. Here are my thoughts on it. My parents got married for the first time then it was my sister Karin and then Me. They either got divorced when I was 2 or 3 or got divorced when I was 4 and then my mom, my sister and I moved to Longfellow apartments. Longfellow apartments was also "the happening" place to live until now. And then they remarried again when I was either 6 or 8. Now it is about 1,000 dollars to live there at this day and age. That was also either when I was 3 or 4 selective mutism showed up. So shut up this is from my own head. If you have ...