Sunday November 28, 2021 | So many thoughts so little time

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I have so many thoughts in my head right now I don't even know where to start.  First off. I'm about to say something that I think I might regret but I might not.  I have never felt like this about anyone before.  AJ is different.  I want to be with him.  

The apartment I want to get or rent actually is Delta Manor is close to Parkdale Mall.  Just that all is need is a supported living counselor to help me or someone else?  

I am really confused.  I'm still trying to figure out how he would call me his girl, or huney. Still trying to figure out---would he call anyone else that?  I'm still confused.  I want some answers but I'm afraid of this rejection.  :'(  If someone really wanted to be with someone like me--they would do anything to make that happen, right?  But he's respectful to my parents and wanting me to ask them if I could or if we could meet?  shit that didn't come out right.  

Maybe everyone is just teasing me. Okay, that's it---everyone is just teasing me I guess.  You know? I'm going to be dead one of these days. Jason had told me that. Yeah, I'm just having fun and so is AJ. Still I wish it was for real though. Does he talk to everyone like that? I'm confused. I guess I'm just always used to people like Jason talking so negatively to me because he was always talked to so negative by his mother and his sister. 

I just wish I could really date AJ but I know that my mom won't let me because Jason is such an asshole. It is not fair that one guy has to ruin it for everyone else. 😢😢😢  okay that last part did not sound right. 


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