Wednesday July 5, 2023 | a new kids fan

-
A Nkotb fan popped into my life.  Not all New Kids fans are females just to let you know.  But he is making me see that I can do things but if he really wants to get involved, in reality, he will have to ask my dad a very important question if he really wants to do that thing. But then again he could be gay and Jason doesn't have anything to worry about.  Everyone in my family and especially Jason knows that I am a very incompetent woman and not to mention mentally a three-year-old.  I mean I know the basic stuff of taking care of myself, but when it comes to money and speaking to people. No one thinks that I can speak to people in some situations.  There is a whole new side of me that no one even dares to even want to know. Wanting or deserving someone who respects me and I can love.  Do I even deserve that even though I am incompetent and can't really barely balance a checkbook let alone call a doctor?  I know what my family will say, what do you want to call a doctor for?  And that is one of the hardest questions for me to answer!   I guess I don't have any belief in me.  Where did that come from?  I guess it came from being with Jason for 26 years. But since I know him, I have to stay with him.  

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sunday August 25, 2024 | My dream on Saturday night August 24 | Hypnosis for selective mutism

-
I had a dream that I was in the hospital in Galveston Texas like the one I was in when I was 10 years old.  Working on getting rid of SM through hypnosis.  Is there a good hynosis therapist in Beaumont Texas who specializes in selective mutism?   I am determined to overcome selective mutism now or at least most of the way.  Some idiot told me that I won't be able to overcome SM entirely.  Ugh!  Or will I be able to overcome SM entirely?  
Read more

Wednesday August 28, 2024 | Do parent's say this to their kids who have a disability? (the highlighted words in this blog)

-
Got this from copilot from the question I asked, " would people pleasing be an example of "you don't want to disappoint mom do you"? "   Is this true?   Sorry I had a flash back of my dad saying that question phrase that is highlighted in yellow.    (A phrase that my dad said to me when I was 3 and 4 years.)  Ah, the delicate dance between parental expectations and a child’s desire to please! 🕺🌼 Let’s waltz through this topic, shall we? “You don’t want to disappoint mom, do you?” —a phrase that can carry both love and a subtle weight. It’s like a mini emotional tug-of-war, with the child caught in the middle, clutching their teddy bear and pondering life’s mysteries.   Here’s the scoop: The Mom Guilt Tango : Parents often mean well when they say this. They want their child to succeed, be kind, and make them proud. It’s like they’re handing the child a bouquet of expectations, hoping they’ll bloom into the perfect little sunflower....
Read more

Friday February 7, 2025 | Anxiety Disorders and Diabetes

-
I knew this when I was 5 and no one had to tell me this. So is this really true? But because I have selective mutism, my learning challenging and people think that I am stupid. It is that communication thing that people think that I'm stupid. I know the highlighted and BIG LETTERS SOUNDS unreasonable, I just want to get across to people that I am anxious all the time! Do I have to start cursing for you people to hear me? I will. I know that BIG MOTHER OF ALL CURSE WORDS. I bet no one knew that did they? Actually, I got it from those kids at the hospital in Galveston when I was in the hospital back in 1984. So I knew about that word when I was about 9 or 10 years old. Actually when I was 4 years old I felt like I didn't belong because I was trying to tell myself how or where I got my selective mutism and I felt that way for a long time. Maybe my dad has ADHD? Perhaps my parents have ADHD and it somehow turns into autism in children? High-functioning Autism. I th...
Read more