Friday October 24, 2025 | What is on my mind?

My problem is that I listen to other people who tell lies about whom I talk to.  Those people think that the people I talk to are scammers and want to scam me and take advantage of me.  So I just listen to the ones that I live with because I will be living with them the rest of my life.  I will never be able to afford an apartment or even a house.   That is just how life has to be.  I can't get angry about it because I will have a stroke or a heart attack.  I believe that getting angry causes a stroke or heart attack or both.  I try to stay calm and let other people get angry for me.    They can't get angry either, but other people are not as overweight as I am.  I try to meditate, but someone calls meditation "bullshit".  Meditation keeps me calm.  There are two apps I go to for meditation.  They are Insight Timer and "The Mindful Movement" on YouTube.  I pay for YouTube Premium because it is really hard to get out of meditation just to click skip ad and then get right back to meditation. I look for meditation teachers who are certified and I look for fitness trainers who are certified. How do you know that they are certified just by looking at them? Well I it only takes about a year of watching their videos I think. After that I block if I think that they are not good enough or not certified. But all people have different opinions about them and I have to listen to everyone's opinion about everything.     I do play meditation music for my dog, too.  Beaumont Animal Care said she was a Chihuahua mix, but I don't think she is even a Chihuahua.  I think she is more of a Fox Terrier than a Chihuahua.  

Back up there, the people I talk to.  If I thought they scammed or manipulated or took advantage of me, I would block their a**!  But my caregivers just wanted to be sure they don't take advantage of me. So they protect me by telling me to block them and never talk to those people ever again.  

People who live with me are trying to teach me how to clean stuff the right way. There is a right way and a wrong way of doing stuff--like there is a right way and a wrong way of loading the dishwasher. I don't mind unloading the dishwasher but I absolutely hate loading the dishwasher.   People say that I am doing things the wrong way.