Wednesday June 18, 2025 | I am remembering my childhood | I think

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My own transformation, I hope to overcome selective mutism a little bit.  But with a little help from a well trained hypnotherapist by my side, where can I go wrong.  Instead of an apartment I want to save up enough money for a hypnotherapist for me to overcome selective mutism.  This means that I can't ever get an apartment ever again.  But I guess this is worth it to not be able to have an apartment for the rest of my life.  I would rather spend my money on a hypnotherapy session instead of getting an apartment for the rest of my life.  I think other people will say that my safety strategy is not speaking to people.  I do have to agree with them as I have a fear of speaking to people. (shut up I'm talking now)  This is no longer working now because it's getting me in trouble.  It's allowing people to take advantage of me and making people think that is what is best for me.  People probably do think they know what is best for me. I also have to agree with that because I am unable back up what I say.  

I had always believed that I didn't deserve anything.  I never truly earned it.  When we are in school and we studied really hard.  (which i didn't)  I mainly got C's I don't think I ever got any A's.  I did get a D and one F.  I think I did get just one B but that is it.  

What are my protective strategies?  I guess my protective strategies is fear of speaking to people.  That is not working because I am getting into trouble all the time from not speaking.  People are getting frustrated with me.  Other people do struggle with not speaking to people. So it's normal that we struggle with not speaking.  


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