Monday March 20, 2023 | Panic Attack

Last night I had a panic attack about a third cruise I am going on. I kept tossing and turning. I got up to pee and laid back down and listened to a meditation for calming the mind by mindful movement on youtube. Yes, I pay for youtube. It's hard to meditate when you have to click ad and then go back meditating. It messes you up during meditation---and I'm being serious.   Being in an interior cabin on a ship, you don't know what is happening.  The boat rocks and it is kind of rough.  I guess anxiety attack is like being on a cruise ship for two weeks.  I have never been on a cruise for two weeks.  This cruise will be my first time.  *whistles* all the way down there to Panama.  Man, that's a long way.  But damn that will be fun once I get the anxiety over with.  Okay, I will have the SM card around my neck and one anxiety ring on my finger.  Yeah, just one piece of jewelry and a couple of earrings.  What I need to find on the cruise ship is another carnival cruise cup, and another anxiety ring and about 5 to 8 pictures of me, and a coffee cup and are we going up through Cozemel on the way back? Oh yeah, shopping. But I heard on cruise to Panama, that you stay on the ship the whole time. I wonder if it is true?