Wednesday November 16, 2022

I hear the heater kicking on downstairs and it's kind of chilly up here. I feel my body sinking into the chair and my arm kind of hurts from where I was lifting 6 to 8 pound weights. Then I feel the center of my foot hurts where I walk on it.  It is probably foot faucitis but that is beside the point.  I feel the christmas fudge that I just ate in my mouth. It is creamy and delicious and smooth chocolate.  

As you meditate you quiet your mind and you are able to think as you journal and write things down. I have been practicing meditation since AJ suggested it. Then one day I was playing around with my tablet and typed in a meditation app in Google play store. I thought I would try it. AJ did suggest that I try meditation. He told me that he said he did tell me to try meditation. I thank you AJ you are sweet to suggest meditation to me. I love you but as friend. If you want anything more you will have to make the first move and let me know what he's doing. 

Gratitude prompts to discover who I am.

Write about a time when you laughed uncontrollably. 

1) I can still see myself rolling around on the floor laughing and I was laughing so hard.  I was just basically laughing for no apparent reason. Me and my family had just gotten back from eating at a restaurant.  Maybe a Mexican restaurant it seems like.  

Appreciate a friend who lives far away but is dear to you.

2) I have a friend who is dear to me. She was a childhood friend back in elementary school.  We used to do everything together. I could talk to her about everything and anything.  But because of the selective mutism(anxiety) which prevented me from speaking to her.  Yeah she is a dear friend to me and even though I am unable to speak to her.  We met back in 2nd grade.  Her name was Jennifer Ash, (Hakes).  

Write about someone that you really admire. 

3) I have a friend I met over 10 years ago.  I don't really know but the more I talked to him the more I liked him alot.  Back in April 2022 he left me to help someone out with her three kids and one on the way. So he could speak with someone and help them out.  He told me that he would miss talking to me.  So I guess he is happy.  He told me once that if he makes it across the Texas boarder, he has pretty much made his decision. I am willing to wait forever for him.  Not sure how true that is.  I'm sure he is honest with everyone he meets.  I guess he was afraid of getting me in trouble with his chaos.  I want to chat with him again.  Can he just tell her to and I hate to have to say this but can he tell her buzz off from her?  I know, He wants someone who can talk with him.  I can speak, but only in specific situations and to specific people and it is getting better and easier!!!  My mom was right when she told me that back in 80's when I was at the hospital in Galveston as I read a letter from her in Galveston.  She said that it would get better and easier.